The Labour Party has vowed to remain firmly on the sidelines and to continue to “give a voice to the bemused dumbstruck rubbernecking masses at the scene of the Celtic Car Crash” despite slipping back into 3rd place in the recent Red C opinion poll.

Labour has gained enormously in popularity recently with it’s lovable rose logo and radical “name that doesn’t begin with ‘F’” policy.

Labour leader Eamon Gilmore has promised to keep pressure on the government by staring hard at them across the floor of the Dail. Read more »

Acting Taoiseach Brian Cowen today took a well earned break from fisting the economy to death by leading a St Patrick’s Day march in Chicago.

Mr Cowen will later this week travel to Washington where he will play the stage Irish card and present a crystal bowl of weeds to US President Barack Obama. This will be his second time to make a presentation to the leader of the free world but will differ in two key respects from last year. Firstly the crystal bowl will not be manufactured in Ireland as we no longer have an indigenous cut crystalware industry; secondly Mr Cowen’s autocue camera will have a big picture of a pint above it with a sign reading “THIS IS YOUR SPEECH DOPE” above that to prevent a repeat of last year’s faux pas when Mr Cowen tried to deliver the president’s speech in error.

The acting Taoiseach will return with plenty of duty free in just over a week and is expected to commence work on his forthcoming autobiography.

A rough of the cover of acting Taoiseach Brian Cowen’s autobiography

From The Emergency an appeal to Brian Cowen to come off it as we head back towards engagement. Altogether now: “Na-na-na NAMA NAMA; NAMA NAMA. Hey, Brian!”

 

 Hey Brian [4:45m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Recorded by Paddy Meegan at Hollywood Studios

The Taoiseach has arrived at Ballybritt raceourse and demanded that everyone cooperate fully with legisltion on NAMA, the body being set up to establish the right to debt of the unborn in Irleland.

“This should not be cynically used as an opportunity to examine or improve legislation by opposition members in the Dail,” said Mr. Cowen in the saddling enclosure. “The time for that sort of luxuriating in pointless debate is not now, but in the future, when I’m dead”.

Mr. Cowen was narrowly defeated in the subsquent race.

This week we present a special series of clips related to The Green Party, starting with John Gormley, leader of the Green party here talking openly, honestly and bravely about the dire consequences for smaller parties when getting into bed with Fianna Fail.

This sketch was first broadcast in Episode 16 of Series 1 on June 17 2009.

Cast: Dermot Carmody, Karen Ardiff, Joe Taylor

 

 Election Dysfunction [1:49m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

As our leaders publish the latest catalogue of hairshirt requirements just prior to fecking off into the sunset, it seems appropriate to reprise on the site this sketch/song: Summer Recess.

Cast: Everybody!

 

 Summer Recess [4:14m]: Play Now | Play in Popup | Download

Recorded by Mark @ Mutiny Studios.