Táiniste Launches New Logo For Department of Education

The vibrant new look DoES logo

Táiniste and Minister for Education and Skills this morning launched a new logo for her redesigned department. We reproduce below a transcript of her speech to assembled reporters.

Fáilte romhat,
Welcome to the launch of the new official logo for the Department of Education and Skills. This exciting new visual “brand” is taken from an original 1868 print by the Irish artist Henry Doyle. I feel that it is only fitting that we should launch this logo simultay…smultt….simeolt…..at the same time as the Leaving and Junior Certificate exams commence.
The mission of the Department of Education and Skills is to provide high-quality education which will (a) enable individuals to achieve their full potential and to participate fully as members of another society somewhere overseas; and (b) contribute to Ireland’s social, cultural and economic development, by eh…leaving.

Chief among my Department’s priorities are the promotion of equity and inclusion, quality outcomes and lifelong learning; we aim to do this by making sure that every single student knows how to book a Ryanair flight regardless of their background. Let them go! Away on now with themselves and have a few jars and its only a bit of craic overseas sure haven’t we been at it like that since cheap air travel came in during the famine.

I would like to take this opportweenity to wish all students sitting their exams today the very best of luck. To those of you not presently sitting State examinations, or those of you who are sitting the Junior Cert, this Government has one thing to say. Hurry the fuck up and leave for good so that we don’t have to give you any of the money that we are currently squeezing from your parents until they die. Don’t worry that in your absence we will be unable to take money from you. You will still have links to this island as part of a Brave New Diaspora, and we will get you as soon as you come back to settle your deceased parents affairs.

Finally, I would like to inform all of you gathered members of the media that contrary to misleading reports, this logo does not represent money going overseas. The contract was awarded to a friendly Manchester based design company with excellent credentials. It was they who personally assured me that the image in the logo would be by an Irish citizen.

Where am I now? Lets see….knowledge economy….blah blah blah…..children are our future…..ah feck it ye get the gist

That’s all. Fuck off now away with yourselves. The buffet has been cancelled. Fuck off now.

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