Scientists Discover New Virus Strain

“Hello Ji-im…helloJi-iiim – I’m the boss of you” Count John ‘Eccles’ Delaney of the FAI

Scientists at Clara Univeristy Co. Offally have isolated a new flu virus thought to be several times more deadly than H1N1 (Human Swine Flu). The virus has been classified as G0On5 (You Deaded Me You Fithy Rotten Swine Flu).

Symptoms include whininess, immaturity and a desertion of logic and dignity. High profile sufferers of the virus in Ireland include John Delaney and the FAI, MaFFiana Fail, most of Fine Gael, all pro-coalition Greens and several lay catholics.

Sadly for sufferers there is no cure, although a really good kick up the hole may be therapeutic for anyone forced to listen to the whinging and nonsense of those afflicted, but only if they are the ones administering the treatment

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