“Rarrrr!” Leadership At Last As Fierce Martin Comes Very Close To Resigning

Micheal Martin

An awed nation marvelled at the strength in depth of the Fianna Fail front bench as Minister Micheál Martin this evening resigned from the cabinet saying: “I can no longer allow the party to be humiliated by a sorry parade of weakness and indecision. It is therefore, with heavy heart and pursed lips that I have tendered my resignation to the Taoiseach who I will challenge for leadership of the party as he is not fit to lead it”.

However seconds later it emerged that, in a characteristically brilliant political manouvre, Brian Cowen had refused to accept this resignation, leaving only one option open to his colleague and adversary. Martin explained:

“I can no longer allow the party to be humiliated by a sorry parade of weakness and indecision. It is therefore with heavy heart and pursed lips that I have accepted the refusal of the Taoiseach of my resignation. I will now challenge him in an atmosphere of mutual respect for leadership of the party. Or I might kiss him. I’m so afraid and confused. Human emotional relationships are a continuum, you know?”

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