“Olli Spice”: Full Text Of EU Commissioner Rehn’s Message For The Irish People

Olli Rehn: I'm On A Pig

Olli Rehn: I'm On A Pig

The Emergency Breaking News has exclusive advance text of an address to the Irish People due to be made from a beach by EU Commissioner Olli Rehn later today:

“Hello, Bog Pigs. Look at your country. Now back to me. Now back at your country. Now back to me.

“Sadly your country isn’t me, but if it stopped using banky-scented hogwash and switched to Olli Spice, it could smell like it’s me.

“Look down. back up. Where are you? You’re on a boat floating in an endless ocean of shite with the man your country could smell like.

“What’s in your hand? Back at me. I have it, It’s an oyster with two one way tickets to that country you’d love to emigrate to. Look again. The tickets are now free cheese.

“Any f*cked up shit is possible when your country smells like Olli Spice and not a greasy FF septic tank mishap.

“I’m on a pig.”

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