Meanwhile, All Over Ireland Its ‘Opposite Week’

DATELINE IRELAND…
Once the preserve of small children allowed to dress up as their parents and rename animals and everyday objects, Opposite Day has become (in Ireland at least) an extended festival covering several days. Or months. Or even lifetimes.

NAMA TO SAVE ECONOMY
Thus on Opposite Day, NAMA has pledged to enter the market as a lender. To paraphrase Polonius in Hamlet “Neither a borrower nor a lender be. Be both. Who cares when you’re billions in the hole eh? Wisha throw another couple of thousand kids’ futures on the bonfire Paudeen, Mr Trichet will be after catching his death”

SATIRE IS DEAD
Fianna Fail leader Micheal Martin pledged yesterday to ban corporate donations to political parties. Stop it Micheal! My sides! You’re killing me!

FINE GAEL/LABOUR COALITION IN FLIP FLOP SHOCK
“We have a Five Point Plan” Stop it Enda! Please!
“It’s Labour’s way, or Frankfurt’s way” Oh Jesus Eamon! It hurts! It hurts!
“It was never a Jobs Budget it was always intended to be a Jobs Initiative” Oh lads! You’ve gone and done it now! It’s running down my leg…You’re worse than Micheal…no. Really. You are

WAS IT FOR THIS TONY THE TIGER DIED?

Kellogg’s have announced that they are to replace Coco the Monkey, a hyperactive sugar and chocolate addicted cartoon primate as mascot for their Coco Pops brand. The popular cartoon animal is being given the heave-ho in favour of Jedward, who are between them a hyperactive sugar and chocolate addicted cartoon primate. It is thought to be the first time in history that an animated character has lost out on a gig to a rival with a lower IQ. It is also the first time that Kellogg’s have opted to voluntarily print a photographic warning on a box of their cereal which shows what can happen if you consume it.

Be Sociable, Share!

Leave a Reply