Master Thief Announces Heist Crew

The names of the nine board members of NYMA (Not Your Money Anymore) have been announced by Minister for Theft Brian Lenihan.

They are Mr Albert Capone, Ms Bonnie Andclyde, The Mekon, Pestilence, Plague, War, Famine, and Professor Moriarity. Former Revenue chairman Frank Daly will be chairman, and will step down from his current position as a public interest director at Anglo Irish Bank. That last part is worth repeating one word at a time. His. Current. Position. As. A. Public. Interest. Director. At. Anglo. Irish. Bank.

Q, who is currently working do destroy The Enterprise and the galaxy, will be appointed to the board next May when he retires from the Q Continuum.

The Minister said more than 800 applications were received from people wanting to be board members, but since the majority of these were people entirely unconnected with gang raping the state, they were disregarded out of hand.

Shady gangland figure ‘The Minister’ strikes again

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