Loveable West Cork Sponger Fined €60 And Given 4 Penalty Points Over Mobile Phone Use

HOW HE WAS CAUGHT: Former Senator Ivor Necklikeajockeysbollix pictured using the discreet modern telephone apparatus which he recently claimed expenses for after purchasing it from The Marconi Telegraph & Trans-Atlantic Cable Company, which he insists is still trading near Cobh

Former Senator Ivor Necklikeajockeysbollix has been fined €60 for holding a mobile phone while driving and he will also receive four penalty points on his licence.

The colourful West Cork sponger had denied the offence and claimed that he was using a state of the art hands-free device for which he had several corroborating invoices whilst driving.

He was convicted at Dublin District Court after evidence from a Garda officer that he was using his phone whilst driving a blue Jaguar car on Ballybough Road in Dublin on 11 October last year. It is about as much justice as he is ever expected to face in this state until the inevitable passage of “bloodthirsty mob” legislation, better known as all out rebellion, expected in 2013.

Accepting the Garda’s evidence, the judge handed down the sentence of a €60 fine and four penalty points. The Houses of the Oireachtais are already steeling themselves for his inevitable claim for the expense incurred.

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