Listen To The Radio! We’re Graaaaaand!!

Here is the news. Taoiseach Brian Cowen’s position is described today as “unassailable”. Mr Cowen himself has been lauded internationally as a “paragon of sobriety, wit and sagacity”.

Ireland is “fundamentally the most stable economy in the solar system” according to the international financial markets. Europe thinks we are “only massive so we are”.

A high ranking spokesman for the EU told RTFF news today that negative opinions, expressed by the tiny minority of whingers and begrudgers opposed to sensible government policies, are “unhelpful and uncalled for”. The official urged an end to this wholly unnecessary practice.

Science minister Fredo Lenihan has announced the creation of a million jobs in a proposed factory producing church approved teaching aids. That’ll be great.

That’s all for now, RTFF news will be back at noon, and remember we’re broadcasting all this year from the ploughing championships.

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