I Never Met Coked Up Culinary Temptress – Egan
I don’t remember Nigella. We never once met – if we had I might have had the chance to fawn pathetically as she hoovered up ‘Colombian marching powder’ before dinner, or, for that matter, smoked cannabis while out of her mind on coke after dinner.
The times I never met her over the last 10 years I must have been particularly….
….continued on pages 4 – 36
Inside our weekly magazine “Nigella – should she be put to death? Eoghan Harris says YES!”
FASHION – Be a domestic goddess without being off your ample tits – The best faux coke tips for your upper lip this Xmas
CELEBRITY INTERVIEW – Marian Finnucane tells our reporter “Cough! cough cough cough! Gaaaaasp! Cough! Nigella gasp! Cough! Wheeeeeze”