Enda Game

How CRUTCH reported the impending leadership contest

The end is in sight for at least one of the contestants in today’s Fine Gael Leadership contest – in spite of a ruling by the commercial court yesterday finding the term “Fine Gael Leadership” to be a breach of Trade Descriptions Legislation.

Special teams have been working around the clock getting vital supplies of crutches and ammunition to Fine Gael HQ

The Emergency has come into possession of a recent copy of Crutch the official Fine Gael party newsletter which shows that the party is fully prepared for the coming days and weeks. Phil Hogan the party’s Environment, Heritage & Local Government spokesman is interviewed in the publication and assures Fine Gael members that all possible precautions have been taken to prevent a bloodbath.

The interview, headlined “Happiness is a Warm Heave” outlines distribution centres for party members looking to collect their official FG crutch (guaranteed to last for at least one leader). There are tips on aiming and reloading for those who fire wide first, and a draw for a coveted visit to the Fine Gael inner sanctum the Crutch Room – a shrine to leading members at Fine Gael HQ in Mount St.

A rare glimpse inside the hallowed Fine Gael ‘Crutch Room’ at Mount Street

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One Response to “Enda Game”

  1. Pat Donnelly Says:

    Fab photo! Do you have access to a newspaper or was it Google?

    I still do not understand George Lee and how he was bought or frightened off? Maybe the new party or else a wave of independents can save Kathleen ni Houlihan?

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