Enda Finally Hits Jackpot

ABOVE: One of the Fine Gael Leader’s new celebrity endorsements

Fine Gael ‘Taoiseach in waiting’ Edna Kenny (Mrs) has hit the big time with an upcoming wave of celebrity endorsements and a pending movie and comic book tie-in.

Party hard man Phil Hogan explained to The Emergency that since it was perfectly normal that his leader had had to “Sell himself like a commodity or some kind of lapdancer in the election campaign, he now has the bit between his teeth”.

Citing the Ahern Precedent Fine Gael sources have stated that as nothing has really changed in material terms since the election with regard to the national finances – in the same way it is now “…acceptable for Enda to make a bit of cash for the party by sitting in the odd kitchen cupboard”.

The forthcoming FG-MEN ORIGINS franchise looks set to make up to 12 euros for Fine Gael

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