Barroso Thanks Irish Voters For Yes Vote

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EU Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso congratulating Irish voters for believing that jobs and recovery can come from the Lisbon Treaty

EU Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso has issued a statment thanking the Irish electorate for their Yes turnout in favour of the Lisbon Treaty last friday – he has also thanked Coir and Jim Corr for the part that they played in undermining the No vote by muddying the legitimate argument against the future unaccountability and militarisation of the EU with spaced out conspiracy theories and adherence to medieval fairy tales.

Richard Greene of Coir – the organisation that puts the mental into religious fundamentalist has claimed that his organisation’s posters (which were packed with more provable untruths than the bible) were the outright winners in the campaign, but there again he sincerely believes that a ficticious teenage virgin chattel in Judea gave birth to a superbeing 2000 years ago capable of guiding his destiny today. In the 21st century.

Simple millionaire Jim Corr meanwhile is thought to be preparing himself for the rapture by stockpiling aluminium foil and is preparing a plan to kidnap renowned hat maker Philip Treacy. Famous for being the not very accomplished guitarist in a not very hip band with his not very well fed sisters, Corr is also considering a career as stumbling block for hire, or as copilot on David Icke’s flying saucer to Tralfamadore.

Meanwhile acting Taoiseach Brian Cowen interupted his stay in a bottle briefly with warm words for the Irish people who he said had spoken decisively, unlike last year, when they….. spoke decisively. The rest of his speech was drowned out by the thousands and thousands of protected jobs with the finest of conditions and highest standards which began to pour into the Irish economy on saturday morning and which will continue for ever and ever and ever heralding an end to the downturn and the dawn of recovery promised by Pat Cox, Eamon Ryan, the Liberal SOCODU poster babes et al ad nauseaum.

We’ll see. Or “baaa“, as the threatened predominantly middle class Irish yes voter who will cling to any chance that they might claw their way out of debt would have it.

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