ANALYSIS: Acting Taoiseach Fails To Wow With “Lanigan’s Ball” Reshuffle

Acting Taoiseach Brian Cowen, the man with the shaky pair of hands, has failed to revitalise his cabinet preferring to ludicrously swap the deck around; bringing in only two new face cards, a new whip and a small number of juniors mainly as a sop to the whining failed hippies in the Green Party.

His determination to maintain the status quo is best underlined by his promotion of Clare maFFioso Tony Kileen to Defence. This is a move which keeps the portfolio in the hands of a Shannon region TD, and one which interestingly enough maintains an unofficial Miinister for Meddling With The Law.

This last ‘portfolio’ was held by former Minister for Fruit and Vegetables Trevor ‘Pureheart’ Sargent. Kileen can ably step up to this additional plate as he has form in writing letters pleading retrospective leniency for constituents who have been banged up. In Trev’s case it was a bruised nimby – Killeen, proving that Fianna Fail does everything bigger and better, has pleaded in the past for two murderers and a child rapist.

By their works shall ye know them

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