2,000 Year Old “Bog Body” Proposed For Aras

Prehistoric human remains, believed to be those of a woman, have been found in Co Laois.

The significant find has been described as “significant” by Dr Rex Bonehandler, Curator of the Understatement division at the National Museum of Ireland.

The 2,000 yr old “bog body” was immediately approached by several anti Gay Mitchell Fine Gael activists to stand in the presidential election later this year.

Una Bog-Body, a woman of the land

The campaign poster for Fine Gael's latest presidential candidate Una Bog-Body, a woman of the land

Speaking at the site, Teddy FitzHerbert (67), current chair of Young Fine Gael, said “At present we can see a pair of legs, which are quite well preserved, probably the best preserved part of the body,” he said. “On preliminary examination we can be reasonably certain that it is a female candidate.”

He said at this stage he did not know the precise age or gender of the individual, and the body appears to be missing the torso and head, “But sure that never stopped Michael Noonan from winning an election”.

“We’re delighted to have a woman, or incredibly feminine man, of such experience, charm, calibre and dare I say it, acquiescence on the Fine Gael ticket for the Aras” he concluded

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